I owe, I owe, so it's off to work I go.

I am not a conspiracy theorist. I don't think everyone's out to get me. I don't think I'm owed anything. I don't cheat people out of things because I'm sure that I was owed that little perk somewhere along the way. I may have given away free candy to my friends while working at the video store in high school, but everyone was doing it, and I've confessed it and been washed clean of all my bad deeds.

Anyway.

I'm trying to consolidate mine and Todd's school loans. And it is a whip. I get mail piece after mail piece, indicating that consolidating is the best thing to do, there's "SMART LOAN" consolidation mail pieces in my mailbox every week. So I go online, spend 4 hours completing the application, and rather than just hitting "submit" I chose the option of having THEM print the application and mail it to me for review. So I've reviewed it.

I chose a company, Sallie Mae, that I've had loans with for the past seven years. They've always offered me a great interest rate - 3.85%. So when I was completing their application, I entered the 3.85% rate in the area next to my loans. When I get the printed version, it has those loans listed at 6.1%. How could this be wrong? I mean, I'm consolidating with this company, they've got to have it on file. If they'd gotten one of my other lenders wrong, I could start to understand that.

So I called them today...I explained to them they had it wrong. Turns out that if I consolidate (translation - bring more money to the table FOR THEM to earn interest on), then my rate goes up, and therefore increases the consolidated rate. There's absolutely no incentive to consolidate.

Speaking of the consolidated rate - it's nowhere on the application that I am required to sign and return. I asked the chick on the phone, "Do people normally sign and return these without being given a rate for their new consolidated loan?" She said, "Ma'am, customer service representatives are trained to tell people on the phone what their rate would be, and what their estimated monthly payment is." WTF? What if I hadn't called? They just let these things slip through in hopes that no one is reading the fine print.

So it got me thinking...how much paperwork have I signed in my lifetime (don't even get me started on car buying) where I've signed off on a few dollars here and there being taken from me without my complete knowledge and understanding? And how much has that added up to, in the last 30 years? And, who in the hell has time to read all the fine print with every business transaction you make?

My estimate is that the amount of money I've been screwed out of in my lifetime likely exceeds the amount I make in a year. I wish I had the time to do a study like this. Dateline, if you're reading the Luckey Girl blog, will you please get on this????

Nonetheless, again, I still don't feel like anyone owes me.