Clearly, there's a problem here.
I'm drinking more (water, cokes, and the such). Pair that up with the long hours I'm putting in at the office lately, I am forced to use the work bathroom from time to time. I simply cannot wait until I get home anymore.
I hate HATE HATE HATE it when I go into the bathroom and...
a. someone's also in the bathroom, going #1
b. that someone is talking to me
c. someone is in a stall going #2
d. Jesus, if that person is talking to me I have to reverse my direction into the stall and commence vomiting.
e. the #2 person walks out and leaves me as the guilty party, should anyone else come in, or
f. that person walks out of the stall with reading material
g. #1 or #2 don't wash her hands -- at all -- or just the water sprinkle before exiting the bathroom.
h. I walk in and someone has just gone #2, leaving me unable to breathe for however long it takes me to get OUT
As I sit here typing, I'm thinking of all the other things I hate about using public restrooms. I am obsessed with it. Not just passing thoughts or pondering, I am OBSESSED. It consumes me. I sit at my desk and wait, wait, wait until I can't wait any longer. Then I have to start the counting, and head down there.
It doesn't help things that, as I've mentioned before, women (women!) have left #2 on the floor in our bathroom on MORE THAN ONE OCCASION. I can't fathom it. I can't deal with it. This is reason enough to work from home permanently.
I should mention, that strangely enough, it doesn't bother me if my friend (and co-worker) Mary talks to me while we're in the bathroom. She could start talking about cooking up some split pea soup and it wouldn't bother me in the least. This is all I know.
I hate HATE HATE HATE it when I go into the bathroom and...
a. someone's also in the bathroom, going #1
b. that someone is talking to me
c. someone is in a stall going #2
d. Jesus, if that person is talking to me I have to reverse my direction into the stall and commence vomiting.
e. the #2 person walks out and leaves me as the guilty party, should anyone else come in, or
f. that person walks out of the stall with reading material
g. #1 or #2 don't wash her hands -- at all -- or just the water sprinkle before exiting the bathroom.
h. I walk in and someone has just gone #2, leaving me unable to breathe for however long it takes me to get OUT
As I sit here typing, I'm thinking of all the other things I hate about using public restrooms. I am obsessed with it. Not just passing thoughts or pondering, I am OBSESSED. It consumes me. I sit at my desk and wait, wait, wait until I can't wait any longer. Then I have to start the counting, and head down there.
It doesn't help things that, as I've mentioned before, women (women!) have left #2 on the floor in our bathroom on MORE THAN ONE OCCASION. I can't fathom it. I can't deal with it. This is reason enough to work from home permanently.
I should mention, that strangely enough, it doesn't bother me if my friend (and co-worker) Mary talks to me while we're in the bathroom. She could start talking about cooking up some split pea soup and it wouldn't bother me in the least. This is all I know.
posted by Lauri at 1:07 PM
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